It’s been over a year since I posted about mom guilt and I figured it was time to touch on that subject again 🙂
Because yesterday… I was not the best mom 🙂 And I was in grave danger of some serious mom-guilt!
It’s summer and expectations run high in our house for what we’re going to do and who we’re going to see. I myself have the best of ideas when it comes to creating fun and seeing loved ones.
But what happens when suddenly it’s all going to s%& and nothing is going right?! Well, then everything falls to pieces and I get mad and grumpy and then I’m not very nice and then I feel bad about myself and then I stew on that and then and then and then. #momguilt
Yesterday as I knowingly strutted my grumpy face around I nagged and lectured and pleaded… all the things I secretly vow never to do. I just didn’t care- until later that is… when Taylor went to go spend the night at his friend’s house and I had to give him a kiss goodbye. I was going to miss him! I LOVE him! He’s not being HORRIBLE! He’s a nine-year-old boy! He’s the best!… it was all I could think as I gave him his goodbye kisses and apologized for being such a monster-y momma.
There was no winning that day… other than NOT completely beating myself up for it I guess…?
So that was my win. I chose to forgive and move forward. Taylor knows I love him. The littles know I love them. We are all ok and gosh darnet, we’re all doing our very best.
Sometimes I think about that… Brene Brown (Author, Speaker, and Researcher) claims that everyone in the whole world is truly doing the very best that they can do at that point in time. That’s the most gracious thought I’ve ever heard. I see lots of people around me that definitely don’t seem to be doing their very best. But the reality is, is that I kind of think we are. On my worst day I’m still trying to get better and be better and respond appropriately. On my worst day I’m holding back the curse words that are on the tip of my tongue, about to spill over when my toddler’s around. On my worst day I certainly behave worse than on my best day. But hey, that’s why it’s not my best day, right?!
So friends 🙂 Could you use a hug today?
Can I tell you that I believe in you and the fight that you have right now? I know you’re doing your best. I believe that you’ve had better 🙂 But today’s not always a guarantee of that, right? So good job. Even when you’re failing, it’s okay. Even when you mess up and make things worse, it’s okay. You’re loved at your best. You’re loved at your worst. Think of your children. Do you love them any less when they’re the ones being monster-y? Of course not. Extend yourself the same grace.
Let’s not spend more energy beating ourselves up over what we’ve done than actually making a change for the better 🙂 (It’s possible you just need some sleep, or some food, or some quiet… or some love…or all of the above!)
You’ve probably got time to get it right if you’ve been wrong. Take a deep breath. Hug your kids. Hug your person. Tell them you love them. Apologize when you’re wrong. It’s all good.
Mom-guilt (Dad-guilt, Employee- guilt, Son/Daughter-guilt, Whoever you are-guilt)…. be gone!